Funny Replies to "What's New With You?"

When someone asks, “What’s new with you?” it can feel like a blank slate, but why not fill that slate with some humour?ย 

In case youโ€™re catching up with an old friend or trying to lighten the mood at a gathering, a funny response can keep the conversation lively. Here are witty replies to “What’s new with you?” that are sure to get a laugh (or at least a smile)!

Top List Of  Replies to “What’s New With You?”

“I just got a pet rock! His name is Rocky.”

2. “I decided to become a professional napper.”

3. “Iโ€™ve started a new diet: I call it the โ€˜See Foodโ€™ diet.”

4. “Iโ€™m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it!”

5. “I just enrolled in a course on how to procrastinate.”

6. “Iโ€™ve been busy reinventing the wheel. Itโ€™s going great!”

7. “I just learned how to fold a fitted sheet. Itโ€™s a miracle!”

8. “Iโ€™ve joined a support group for people who can’t stop telling dad jokes.”

9. “I just got a promotion: Iโ€™m now the CEO of my couch!”

10. “Iโ€™m developing my skills as a professional binge-watcher.”

11. “Iโ€™ve started a new hobby: collecting dust!”

12. “I just found out I can fit into my high school jeansโ€ฆ for one leg!”

13. “Iโ€™m starting a new career in interpretive dancing. Wanna see?”

14. “Iโ€™m learning how to speak fluent emoji. ๐Ÿ“ฑ๐Ÿ’ƒ”

15. “Iโ€™m cultivating my garden of procrastination. Itโ€™s blooming nicely!”

16. “I just took up extreme ironing! Itโ€™s thrilling!”

17. “Iโ€™m trying to break the world record for most coffee consumed in a day.”

18. “Iโ€™m starting my own โ€˜How to Avoid Responsibilityโ€™ blog.”

19. “Iโ€™ve been secretly training to become a cat whisperer.”

20. “Iโ€™ve joined a team of professional snackers. We take our job very seriously!”

21. “Iโ€™m preparing for the annual couch potato Olympics!”

22. “Iโ€™ve become a master of online shopping. My skills are top-notch!”

23. “Iโ€™m on a quest to find the best pizza in town. Itโ€™s a tough job!”

24. “I just became the worldโ€™s first professional daydreamer!”

25. “Iโ€™m perfecting my skills in Netflix navigation. Itโ€™s harder than it looks!”

1. “I just got a pet rock! His name is Rocky.”

This classic joke is a playful way to show your quirky side. Everyone loves a pet story, and a pet rock is so absurd that itโ€™s bound to amuse. Plus, it opens the door for more silly conversations.

  • Example 1: “I take Rocky for walksโ€ฆ in my pocket.”
  • Example 2: “Heโ€™s pretty low maintenance, unlike my last pet!”
  • Example 3: “Rocky is great at listening, but he doesnโ€™t talk back!”

2. “I decided to become a professional napper.”

This tongue-in-cheek response highlights your dedication to rest while poking fun at a common pastime. Itโ€™s relatable and invites laughter, especially from those who know the joys of a good nap.

  • Example 1: “I have a nap schedule: 3 naps a day!”
  • Example 2: “Iโ€™m considering putting that on my resume.”
  • Example 3: “Iโ€™m training for the Nap Olympics.”

3. “Iโ€™ve started a new diet: I call it the โ€˜See Foodโ€™ diet.”

This response is punny and clever, playing on the phrase โ€œsee food.โ€ It implies that you eat anything you see, making it humorous for anyone who has tried various diets.

  • Example 1: “Itโ€™s workingโ€”my fridge is always empty!”
  • Example 2: “Iโ€™m especially successful at parties.”
  • Example 3: “I think Iโ€™m going to go pro at it.”
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4. “Iโ€™m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it!”

Another twist on the food theme, this joke is lighthearted and fun. Itโ€™s a great way to keep the mood jovial while subtly nodding to our collective love for food.

  • Example 1: “Iโ€™ve been particularly good at this diet lately.”
  • Example 2: “I even dream about foodโ€”does that count?”
  • Example 3: “I think Iโ€™m gaining some serious skills!”

5. “I just enrolled in a course on how to procrastinate.”

This playful comment is perfect for anyone who finds themselves putting things off. Itโ€™s relatable and humorous, making it easy to connect with others who share the same struggle.

  • Example 1: “But first, I need to take a break!”
  • Example 2: “Iโ€™m actually โ€˜studyingโ€™ right nowโ€ฆ sort of.”
  • Example 3: “The final exam is dueโ€ฆ whenever!”

6. “Iโ€™ve been busy reinventing the wheel. Itโ€™s going great!”

This witty response plays on the idea of being innovative while poking fun at how unnecessary some tasks can be. Itโ€™s a light-hearted way to express that youโ€™re up to somethingโ€”without taking yourself too seriously.

  • Example 1: “Iโ€™m considering launching a new โ€˜wheelโ€™ company!”
  • Example 2: “So far, itโ€™s a circleโ€ฆ still working on the square.”
  • Example 3: “Iโ€™ll keep you posted on my โ€˜progress.โ€™”

7. “I just learned how to fold a fitted sheet. Itโ€™s a miracle!”

Folding fitted sheets can be a real challenge, and this humorous statement highlights that struggle. Itโ€™s a great way to relate to others who have faced the same laundry battle.

  • Example 1: “I feel like Iโ€™ve achieved a life goal!”
  • Example 2: “Now Iโ€™m considering becoming a sheet-folding guru.”
  • Example 3: “I might start offering classes!”

8. “Iโ€™ve joined a support group for people who can’t stop telling dad jokes.”

This response is lighthearted and relatable for anyone who loves puns and dad jokes. Itโ€™s a fun way to bond over shared humour while also admitting to your tendencies.

  • Example 1: “We meet every dadโ€™s day, of course!”
  • Example 2: “The first rule is: no good jokes allowed!”
  • Example 3: “Iโ€™m the presidentโ€”obviously.”

9. “I just got a promotion: Iโ€™m now the CEO of my couch!”

This playful comment reflects the joy of lounging and being comfortable at home. Itโ€™s an amusing way to express that sometimes, doing nothing is the ultimate goal.

  • Example 1: “My job description includes snacks and naps.”
  • Example 2: “I oversee all remote work operations.”
  • Example 3: “The commute is just across the room!”

10. “Iโ€™m developing my skills as a professional binge-watcher.”

This response is perfect for the TV and movie lovers out there. It adds a humorous twist to a common pastime while acknowledging the cultural phenomenon of binge-watching.

  • Example 1: “Iโ€™m currently in training for the next season!”
  • Example 2: “Iโ€™ve logged in enough hours for a diploma!”
  • Example 3: “My couch is my training ground.”

11. “Iโ€™ve started a new hobby: collecting dust!”

This witty remark pokes fun at procrastination while embracing the chaos of everyday life. Itโ€™s an amusing way to share your experiences with tidinessโ€”or lack thereof.

  • Example 1: “I have quite the collection going on!”
  • Example 2: “Iโ€™m thinking of entering it in a museum.”
  • Example 3: “Iโ€™m calling it โ€˜Art of Neglect.โ€™”
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12. “I just found out I can fit into my high school jeansโ€ฆ for one leg!”

This humorous twist on an old struggle is relatable for many who have experienced weight changes over the years. Itโ€™s a light-hearted way to express body positivity while laughing at oneself.

  • Example 1: “Who knew I had such flexibility?”
  • Example 2: “Iโ€™m calling it โ€˜fashion evolution.โ€™”
  • Example 3: “Maybe Iโ€™ll start a one-legged trend!”

13. “Iโ€™m starting a new career in interpretive dancing. Wanna see?”

This over-the-top response adds a touch of absurdity to the conversation, inviting laughter and curiosity. Itโ€™s a fun way to joke about taking a riskโ€”no matter how ridiculous it may sound.

  • Example 1: “I specialize in โ€˜sitting and scrollingโ€™ movements!”
  • Example 2: “Iโ€™m working on my โ€˜coffee cupโ€™ routine.”
  • Example 3: “My performances are exclusively solo for now.”

14. “Iโ€™m learning how to speak fluent emoji. ๐Ÿ“ฑ๐Ÿ’ƒ”

This response reflects our digital culture and the rise of emojis in communication. Itโ€™s humorous and modern, appealing to anyone who enjoys playfully expressing themselves.

  • Example 1: “Iโ€™m pretty good at the smiley face. ๐Ÿ˜Š”
  • Example 2: “Iโ€™m still working on the more complex ones! ๐Ÿค””
  • Example 3: “My favourite is the dancing lady. ๐Ÿ’ƒ”

15. “Iโ€™m cultivating my garden of procrastination. Itโ€™s blooming nicely!”

This clever twist on gardening captures the essence of putting things off in a lighthearted way. Itโ€™s a fun expression that many can relate to when managing daily tasks.

  • Example 1: “I think Iโ€™ll need a bigger pot soon!”
  • Example 2: “The flowers are thriving, just like my excuses!”
  • Example 3: “Iโ€™ll get to weeding it out later.”

16. “I just took up extreme ironing! Itโ€™s thrilling!”

This absurd response is guaranteed to get a chuckle. The concept of extreme ironingโ€”a combination of outdoor adventure and household choresโ€”is outrageous and funny.

  • Example 1: “Iโ€™ve ironed on a cliff, itโ€™s exhilarating!”
  • Example 2: “Next, Iโ€™m trying it underwater!”
  • Example 3: “My next challenge: ironing while skydiving!”

17. “Iโ€™m trying to break the world record for most coffee consumed daily.”

This playful statement shows a love for caffeine while hinting at how it fuels your day. Itโ€™s relatable and can spark conversations about coffee preferences.

  • Example 1: “Iโ€™m currently at five cupsโ€ฆ and counting!”
  • Example 2: “I think Iโ€™ll need a refill just thinking about it.”
  • Example 3: “Is it too early to start preparing for tomorrow?”

18. “Iโ€™m starting my own โ€˜How to Avoid Responsibilityโ€™ blog.”

This tongue-in-cheek remark is a funny way to highlight a common struggle. Itโ€™s relatable and can easily lead to conversations about the joys of procrastination.

  • Example 1: “Iโ€™m currently drafting my first post!”
  • Example 2: “The first chapter is titled โ€˜Netflix and Chill.โ€™”
  • Example 3: “Iโ€™ve got plenty of material to work with!”

19. “Iโ€™ve been secretly training to become a cat whisperer.”

This light-hearted response adds a touch of whimsy while showcasing a love for pets. Itโ€™s a fun way to express a connection with animals, especially cat lovers.

  • Example 1: “Iโ€™m working on my purring technique.”
  • Example 2: “So far, they seem indifferent!”
  • Example 3: “I think Iโ€™m making progressโ€”maybe.”
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20. “Iโ€™ve joined a team of professional snackers. We take our job very seriously!”

This humorous twist highlights the joys of snacking while creating a playful image of a dedicated team. Itโ€™s sure to get a laugh from fellow snack enthusiasts.

  • Example 1: “We have snack meetings every Friday!”
  • Example 2: “Iโ€™m the chief taste tester.”
  • Example 3: “Our motto: โ€˜One bite at a time!โ€™”

21. “Iโ€™m preparing for the annual couch potato Olympics!”

This cheeky response is perfect for anyone who enjoys lounging around. Itโ€™s lighthearted and fun, emphasizing the art of doing nothing.

  • Example 1: “Iโ€™ve been training for weeks!”
  • Example 2: “My event is โ€˜best snack selection.โ€™”
  • Example 3: “I think Iโ€™ll take home the gold!”

22. “Iโ€™ve become a master of online shopping. My skills are top-notch!”

This funny comment reflects our modern shopping habits while adding a touch of humour. Itโ€™s relatable for anyone who loves a good online deal.

  • Example 1: “I can spot a good sale from a mile away!”
  • Example 2: “Iโ€™ve mastered the art of โ€˜just browsingโ€™.”
  • Example 3: “Shipping notifications are my best friends!”

23. “Iโ€™m on a quest to find the best pizza in town. Itโ€™s a tough job!”

This playful statement highlights a love for food while adding a humorous twist to the pursuit of the perfect slice. It invites others to share their favourite pizza places.

  • Example 1: “Iโ€™m collecting reviews like Pokรฉmon cards!”
  • Example 2: “Iโ€™ve already hit three places this week.”
  • Example 3: “The struggle is real, but someone has to do it!”

24. “I just became the worldโ€™s first professional daydreamer!”

This whimsical response is both amusing and relatable. It pokes fun at the art of zoning out while also inviting laughter.

  • Example 1: “My daydreaming skills are off the charts!”
  • Example 2: “I think Iโ€™m ready for a sponsorship.”
  • Example 3: “Iโ€™m working on my dream repertoire.”

25. “Iโ€™m perfecting my skills in Netflix navigation. Itโ€™s harder than it looks!”

This humorous comment speaks to the challenges of choosing what to watch in the age of streaming. Itโ€™s relatable and lighthearted, perfect for sparking conversations about binge-watching experiences.

  • Example 1: “Iโ€™ve seen so many trailers, I might as well write a review!”
  • Example 2: “Iโ€™m considering hosting a movie marathon soon.”
  • Example 3: “Iโ€™ve got my popcorn-making down to an art!”

Conclusion

In conclusion, when someone asks, “What’s new with you?” you donโ€™t have to stick to the usual answers. These funny responses can not only lighten the mood but also spark engaging conversations. Next time youโ€™re in a casual chat, try one of these clever comebacks and see where the laughter takes you!

By Gracie Mae

๐ˆ'๐ฆ Gracie Maeย ๐ญ๐ก๐ž ๐œ๐ซ๐ž๐š๐ญ๐ข๐ฏ๐ž ๐ฆ๐ข๐ง๐ ๐›๐ž๐ก๐ข๐ง๐ "๐–๐ข๐ญ๐ญ๐ฒ ๐‘๐ž๐ฌ๐ฉ๐จ๐ง๐ฌ๐ž๐ฌ " ๐ฐ๐ก๐ž๐ซ๐ž ๐ฐ๐ž ๐ญ๐ฎ๐ซ๐ง ๐จ๐ซ๐๐ข๐ง๐š๐ซ๐ฒ ๐ซ๐ž๐ฉ๐ฅ๐ข๐ž๐ฌ ๐ข๐ง๐ญ๐จ ๐ž๐ฑ๐ญ๐ซ๐š๐จ๐ซ๐๐ข๐ง๐š๐ซ๐ฒ ๐›๐ฎ๐ซ๐ฌ๐ญ๐ฌ ๐จ๐Ÿ ๐ก๐ฎ๐ฆ๐จ๐ซ. ๐–๐ข๐ญ๐ก ๐š ๐Ÿ๐ฅ๐š๐ข๐ซ ๐Ÿ๐จ๐ซ ๐œ๐ซ๐š๐Ÿ๐ญ๐ข๐ง๐  ๐ฌ๐ก๐š๐ซ๐ฉ ๐ฐ๐ข๐ญ๐ญ๐ฒ ๐œ๐จ๐ฆ๐ž๐›๐š๐œ๐ค๐ฌ. ๐ˆ ๐ฌ๐ฉ๐ž๐œ๐ข๐š๐ฅ๐ข๐ณ๐ž ๐ข๐ง ๐ฆ๐š๐ค๐ข๐ง๐  ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ๐ซ ๐ข๐ง๐ญ๐ž๐ซ๐š๐œ๐ญ๐ข๐จ๐ง๐ฌ ๐ฎ๐ง๐Ÿ๐จ๐ซ๐ ๐ž๐ญ๐ญ๐š๐›๐ฅ๐ž. ๐€๐ญ "๐–๐ข๐ญ๐ญ๐ฒ ๐‘๐ž๐ฌ๐ฉ๐จ๐ง๐ฌ๐ž๐ฌ" ๐จ๐ฎ๐ซ ๐ฆ๐ข๐ฌ๐ฌ๐ข๐จ๐ง ๐ข๐ฌ ๐ญ๐จ ๐ข๐ง๐Ÿ๐ฎ๐ฌ๐ž ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ๐ซ ๐œ๐จ๐ง๐ฏ๐ž๐ซ๐ฌ๐š๐ญ๐ข๐จ๐ง๐ฌ ๐ฐ๐ข๐ญ๐ก ๐œ๐ก๐š๐ซ๐ฆ ๐š๐ง๐ ๐œ๐ฅ๐ž๐ฏ๐ž๐ซ๐ง๐ž๐ฌ๐ฌ. ๐ƒ๐ข๐ฏ๐ž ๐ข๐ง๐ญ๐จ ๐ญ๐ก๐ž ๐Ÿ๐ฎ๐ง ๐š๐ง๐ ๐ฅ๐ž๐ญ๐ฌ ๐ฆ๐š๐ค๐ž ๐ž๐ฏ๐ž๐ซ๐ฒ ๐ซ๐ž๐ฌ๐ฉ๐จ๐ง๐ฌ๐ž ๐š ๐ฆ๐ž๐ฆ๐จ๐ซ๐š๐›๐ฅ๐ž ๐จ๐ง๐ž๐ฃ๐จ๐ข๐ง ๐ฎ๐ฌ ๐š๐ญ ๐–๐ข๐ญ๐ญ๐ฒ ๐‘๐ž๐ฌ๐ฉ๐จ๐ง๐ฌ๐ž๐ฌ ๐Ÿ๐จ๐ซ ๐š ๐๐จ๐ฌ๐ž ๐จ๐Ÿ ๐๐ž๐ฅ๐ข๐ ๐ก๐ญ๐Ÿ๐ฎ๐ฅ ๐ก๐ฎ๐ฆ๐จ๐ซ.